Life is a tricky thing, and sometimes, people might have trouble with money. So, it is normal to ask your friend or a relative for help and borrow some cash. But things become a bit different when it’s your boyfriend or a recent love acquaintance who is trying to borrow money from you!
Many women wonder whether it is acceptable and normal if a guy asks them for money. Well, this is what we are going to discuss today. You will learn what to do and what to say to someone who keeps asking for money, especially if this is your boyfriend.
Also, we will explain why men can ask women for cash and how you can tell if your new romantic partner is with you only because of your wealth.
What Shall I Say If My Boyfriend Asks Me For Money?
In general, it is normal when people ask other people for money. There could be different situations in life, and if someone is going through a difficult period in their life, lack of money is a common problem. And in most cases, when it comes to deciding what to do when someone asks for money, people make a decision depending on their point of view regarding this.
However, if it’s not just some random person who is asking for cash but your boyfriend, things might get a bit different.
Shall you lend money or not? And if you don’t want to lend money, how is it best to tell him about your decision?
As for lending or not, it’s ultimately your choice. Only you can decide what to do in this situation. But if you are sure you don’t want to (or can’t) lend him money, it’s good to know how to refuse politely yet firmly.
Below, we have prepared several helpful variants of responses just in case.
- That’s a large sum of money. What do you need all that cash for?
- I’ll always try to help, but first, I must know what you need this money for. It has to be something important. Otherwise, I’ll not borrow you.
- Are you in trouble? This is a considerable sum you are asking for!
- I want to lend you this money, but I need to know it will be put to good use. Can you convince me this isn’t one of your latest grand ideas?
I wish I could help you, but I have too many things to pay for right now.
- No, I can’t do that. I’m helping (put in a person’s name) out, and that’s taking a massive part of cash out of my paycheck.
- You know, things are very tight for me right now, and I can barely help myself. So I can’t lend you money now, sorry. I hope you can find someone else to help you out.
- I’ve had some bad experiences lending people money, and I can’t put myself through that again. I hope you understand.
- Look, I’m not mixing friends and business. I don’t want this money to come between us, so I have to say no.
- You already owe me, and you still haven’t paid that sum of money back. Helping you put me in a hole. This time, I can’t help you.
- Why don’t you try to get a quick payday loan? I know somewhere that can approve you in a few hours with low-interest rates.
- Sorry, but I can’t help you right now. This is not a good time for me financially.
- That’s not a good idea, considering the obstacles I have right now. I have bills to pay, and I can’t afford to take this risk.
- I have a family to take care of, I can’t spend money on anybody else right now. Maybe try asking your parents.
- I’ll see what I can do, but don’t expect anything.
- You’ve asked me a million times, and the answer is still no.
These phrases can be used in different situations, e.g., if a guy is asking you for money again and again or if you are unsure whether to lend or not, and you would like to take your time and think it over.
To Lend or Not to Lend? Things to Consider When a Man Is Asking You for Money
Before you say yes or no to a man who is asking you for money, there are a few things you should take into consideration. They will help you to make the right choice if you are not ultimately sure whether you will lend money to him or not.
Consider Your Relationship With This Guy
Before making a decision, ask yourself what type of relationship you have with this man. Is he a friend or a romantic partner? Is he your colleague? A neighbor or a relative? It will help you figure out how trustworthy you feel him to be.
Obviously, you will be more inclined to lend money to someone you know well enough (like a friend or a family member) than to a guy you barely know. The better your relationship with the person is, the more likely he will pay your money back.
What Sum Of Money He Is Asking For and What He Will Use It For?
Before you lend him money, ask this man what he needs the cash for. Don’t be afraid to ask this question since you have the right to know what your cash will be spent on! If it’s something important like medicine, then landing will be fine. But if he is asking money for something silly (e.g., a vacation trip or gambling), it’s better to say no.
Also, it’s a good thing to land only if you are ready not to get the money back. There is a saying that says one should only lend with the expectation of never getting it back.
So think about the amount of money he asked for. If it is a small sum you can afford not to get back, it might be ok to lend it to him.
However, with large sums of money, you’d better take extra precautions!
Will He Be Able to Repay?
Before lending money, ask him whether he is employed. Also, you need to know whether he will be able to pay you back soon enough. And even if this guy has fallen on hard times and lost his job, you should still be cautious! Is he trying to find new work or just being lazy and expecting financial help from others?
When you figure these things out in advance, it will be easier for you to decide whether you are ready and willing to lend money to him or not. And never be afraid to say no! You are not an ATM or a bank cash office to provide everyone in need with cash!
Why Do Men Ask Women For Money?
People can ask others for money because of different reasons. They might have hard times at the moment, or something unexpected could happen, and they end up with poor income. It means that asking others for money is not always the sign of a “chronic” money beggar!
However, if a man is always with no money, this should alert you!
So why could a boyfriend be borrowing money from a girlfriend?
There are several reasons for this behavior.
- He is an immature person not ready for adult life. He is constantly in need of a “mommy” to take care of him and…give him his “pocket money”!
- Your guy could be a gambler or have other habits that devour his money, leaving him with empty pockets.
- The worst scenario is if a guy is a kind of an addict (alcohol, drugs, etc.).
- He could be a gigolo who used to live on wealthy women’s money.
Either way, none of these reasons shows him as a reliable and trustworthy person. So if you notice your boyfriend or a new romantic partner is constantly asking you for money, if he never pays for you, or he is constantly unemployed, ask yourself whether he is the right man for you.
How to Know If He Is With Me Because Of Money Only?
It hurts to realize that your love partner is with you only because you are a successful businesswoman or your career is speeding up, and you can serve as a potential source of money for him! However, there are still men who choose women with significant potential (including a financial one) to have relationships with them.
They do it simply because they are used to living posh, and they don’t want to work hard for that! But the problem is that such guys are just like any other men around!
Is it possible to pinpoint them somehow?
Well, yes, there are a few signs that can tell you if your boyfriend or a new love acquaintance is interested in your wallet and your bank account way more than he is interested in you!
You Are a “Sugar Mama”
A “sugar mama” term means that a woman has a good job and career, plus she is wealthy enough to live well. She can be a businesswoman or an entrepreneur, or she could be simply very good at her job. The thing that attracts men is her money and success.
So if you meet a new guy who becomes highly interested in you as soon as he learns you earn a lot, ask yourself what exactly he is interested in. Is it you or your money?
He Pays For Everything…at First
If you meet a new guy and he is very sweet and romantic, paying for all your dates and dinners, be careful! He could be a gold digger! Such men are very delicate and attentive at the beginning of the relationship. They are true gentlemen! But the second the woman of interest gets hooked and falls for them, they reveal their true identity.
Eventually, he’ll stop paying for things and assume you will provide and pay for things most or all of the time.
He Has Expensive Tastes
Pay attention to your boyfriend’s tastes and likes. Is he buying things at the brand boutiques only? Does he only travel to the most expensive resorts? If yes, he might be interested in you as his potential wallet!
The rule of thumb sounds like this: a man is dating you for your money if he regularly proposes you go shopping together, suggests traveling with you, or constantly suggests going out to expensive venues. The question is whether you are ready to pay for him or not.
He Is Borrowing Money From You All the Time
There is even no need to explain anything here. If a man is constantly begging you for money while having no job or changing jobs regularly, this is a red flag! Think about what your relationship could be if they would hold only onto your money.
Now you know why men can ask women for financial help and support and what you should say if your boyfriend or another guy is begging you for cash.
As you can see now, their reasons might not always be honest and straightforward, so be cautious and check what your money will be spent on if you decide to lend.
And never be afraid to refuse! It’s the money you earn from hard work, and you have the right to say no to a man who doesn’t realize the price of it.
You can if you are ok with that, and you know they will return the debt. Yes, it is. But it’s good to have a note/receipt from your borrower confirming the deal and its terms. In this case, one could face adverse effects, including fees and penalties, defaulting on your loan, your account going to collections, lawsuits against you, etc.
Frequently Asked Questions
⭐Can you lend money to friends?
⭐Is it legal to borrow money?
⭐What happens if one doesn’t pay a personal loan?
You can if you are ok with that, and you know they will return the debt.
Yes, it is. But it’s good to have a note/receipt from your borrower confirming the deal and its terms.
In this case, one could face adverse effects, including fees and penalties, defaulting on your loan, your account going to collections, lawsuits against you, etc.