How Long Should You Wait to Ask a Girl to Be Your Girlfriend?

When to ask her for a date so that it’s not too early and not too late

Written by Kate Holmsy. Updated on How Long Should You Wait to Ask a Girl to Be Your Girlfriend

Are you thinking of when it is best to ask her to date you, or are you concerned about how soon you should propose to her to become your girlfriend? Congrats! It means that your relationship has moved to a brand new level!

However, it can be rather nerve racking, we know that, and this is why today we will try to help you to figure out how to answer the most thrilling question of every man: when should I ask her to be my girlfriend?

Fasten your belts, guys, since our flight is going to be very exciting today!

How Long Should You Wait Until You Ask a Girl to Be Your Girlfriend?

In a modern world, there is no fixed period of time one should wait before asking a girl to become his girlfriend. How soon you will ask that question hangs upon a bunch of aspects, such as how long you know each other, whether you like her or not, whether you see your future with her, etc.

Quite many men are not quite sure about how long to wait before asking a girl out. And we can understand them pretty well! In a modern society, dating and building relationships is far not like it was with our moms and dads!

It has never been crystal clear how much time you have to wait until you and her have “the talk” and decide whether you want to move forward together or you are fine as you are right now. Too many factors and nuances need to be taken into consideration before you can give at least more or less exact answer:

  • For how long have you been dating already?
  • Do both of you need a direct conversation to make it clear that you are a couple?
  • How much of a good fit are you?
  • How much time do you spend together?
  • Are you sure that you and her want to have serious relationships at all?

See, if you have just met with this girl, it will be a bit odd if you ask her out immediately! You don’t know her, she does not know you, both of you know nothing about each other except for your names! In this case, any plans make no sense at all since you simply need more time for knowing each other better.

But even if you have been dating for a while by now, you might still be unsure whether it is the right time to have “the talk”. Of course, unless you feel and you know that this girl is the very person you want to see beside you in the nearest future.

In general, if you don’t know when to ask a girl to be your girlfriend, we can tell you that doing this after two to four months of dating is fine. In this case, you have enough time to explore the person and figure out whether it’s worth trying to move your relationship to another level or not. And besides, you will have enough time for figuring out how you feel beside her and whether you work well as a couple or not.

How Long Should You Wait Until You Ask a Girl to Be Your Girlfriend
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How to Ask Someone to Be Your Girlfriend?

Asking a girl to be your girlfriend is often quite a stressful thing for a guy! You are constantly worried about what to say when asking a girl to be your girlfriend, about the proper atmosphere when you will be doing this, and about how to catch that very moment when this question must be asked.

However, things are much easier in real life! On the contrary, if you are worried and excited too much, you will most likely do something wrong rather than make a good impression on her.

So first of all relax and think of what you could do to ask her to be your girlfriend. If you have been dating for long enough, you surely know what she likes and what she is not much into. Use this information to figure out what can be done to impress her in a good way and create a proper atmosphere when asking the question of your whole life!

If she is into a more traditional way, then feel free to buy her flowers and her favorite sweets, invite her to the restaurant or her favorite cafe where you will ask her to date you.

Of course, she might like something more unusual! In this case, try to impress her and ask her to be your girlfriend while flying the air balloon or choose another attraction that you know will leave her breathless!

And remember one simple thing: it is not necessary to organize a super romantic night (unless this is what she wants) or prepare a poetic speech! As long as you speak truly and share how you are feeling towards her, everything else doesn’t matter much.

How to Ask Someone to Be Your Girlfriend
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When to Ask a Girl On a First Date?

How long should you wait before asking a girl out? And when is it the right time to ask her to be your girlfriend at all? These questions are definitely whirling around your head round and round while you are waiting for the right time to ask THAT BIG QUESTION.

But in fact, there is no perfect timeline or schedule you can follow when deciding when to ask her to date you. You can’t just decide that you will ask her out after ten dates, and after two months of dating, you will ask her to become your girlfriend. It doesn’t work like this!

There is no ideal formula that will work for every couple and help you to figure out when it is the right time to ask her to go out with you. It may sound disappointing, we know, but everything is not so bad!

When is the right time to ask a girl out? Try not to think of how much time you have been together or how many times you have already been on a date. Everything that is “normal” or practical does not usually work here. Of course, it is not quite a good idea to ask her to go out if you just met yesterday, nevertheless, let your feelings guide you, not just your brain!

Every relationship is different and unique. They thrive at their own pace, and there is no sense to force them. Even the start of your relationship, down to the official ask out, is distinct for each and every couple.

What can be way too soon for one couple may appear to be perfectly suitable and in time for another. It is more important that you and her are aware that you are on the same page about what both of you are looking for. Also, it is essential that both of you are sure that you want to spend more time together seriously. If this is what you have, then it is most likely the right time to ask her out.

And just to make it clear for you once again: don’t push yourself! It’s not a marriage proposal so relax! You might be worried about the wording or the atmosphere, or about being able to catch the right moment to ask her to date you or become your girlfriend…But in reality, none of those matter! If she is also ready for the next step in your relationship, she will say yes even if you ask her to go out with you while cuddling on the sofa with popcorn!

When to Ask a Girl On a First Date
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What Does It Mean Asking Her to Be Your Girlfriend?

Let’s be honest and make it clear at once: asking a girl to become your girlfriend and take your relationship to another, more official level means different things to everyone.

To quite many men, the word girlfriend is just like any other word and it has no special meaning at all. To others, it may mean something special, a person who they care for and feel affection for.

Simply saying, for you a girlfriend can be someone whom you are just dating, or someone whom you are dating exclusively. But that is all. Or, perhaps, having a girlfriend means that you are taking your relationship really seriously and you see your common future with her!

So to answer this question, think of what this word means to you specifically. What does it mean to you to ask a girl to become your girlfriend? Is it just about having a constant partner? Is it just about dating and having a good time together? Or is it about something more?

To help you out with defining what it means to you, we could offer you to answer a few questions. First of all, what is it about this girl that you like? Is it her appearance or figure? Is it her personality?

Then, think of what makes you want to spend more time with her. Do you like just hanging out with her because she is fun? Or you feel there is something deeper and stronger going on between the two of you? Or maybe you already think of considering your true soulmate?

These are the things that you should be thinking about right now in fact. Even before knowing when to ask her to become your girlfriend, you must be absolutely sure what it means and what might be the result of such a proposal.

It must be totally clear to you why you are going to ask her to do this. Is it just because you want her to commit to you? Or do you want her to be official? Or, maybe, you would like to go public with your relationship? Finally, does it mean that both of you see potential with each other?

And only when you know for sure what asking her to be your girlfriend means to you, you can talk to her about it (of course, unless she has already made it clear!). That’s because your girl might have quite different goals in life, as well as a different point of view on your relationship! Maybe she really wants to be official, who knows. Or maybe she just likes staying casual.

If you can figure that out after talking to her, it will be easier for you to realize whether this particular girl suits you, and whether it is possible to build a serious relationship with her at all.

What Does It Mean Asking Her to Be Your Girlfriend
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Are You Ready to Ask a Girl to Be Your Girlfriend?

This is perhaps the most thrilling question a man can ask himself! Is he really ready to ask a girl to become his girlfriend? Or is he not? In fact, to answer this question, you don’t have to be super smart! The answer is surprisingly simple and obvious.

If you have already thought of asking her to date out, and especially if you thought about doing this more than once, you are definitely ready to ask her to become your girlfriend!

However, even if you are almost ready to ask her this question, make sure that you don’t feel forced! Also, it must not feel too soon for you. Of course, you will surely feel anxious (that’s quite normal!), but the basic feeling must be that sense of naturalness about what is happening to you right now.

Of course, you might feel nervous about her potential response, but again, it should feel absolutely right to you to want her to become your girlfriend. Not because someone else says it’s time to do this, and also not because it seems like it’s time to do this because you have been dating for quite a long time.

Forget about all the musts and shoulds! Only you can tell whether it is the right time to ask her to come to another level with you.

As humans, we tend to overthink things, that’s true. However, your readiness to ask her to be your girlfriend will be more or less obvious to you, that’s for sure! In case your relationship has gone from general politeness and friendliness to comfort and openness, you are probably ready to step up from casual dating to a serious relationship with her.

How to ask a girl to be your girlfriendHow to ask a girl to be your girlfriend

Why Do We Often Make Mistakes When Becoming a Couple Too Soon?

You definitely have seen that many times, or you might even be that person yourself. The person who falls into the new relationship way too fast without even knowing the partner well enough. Of course, such “eternal love” lasts for an impressively short period of time leaving both of you heartbroken, disappointed, and devastated.

But why do we do this again and again? It may seem like some sort of obsession, but in fact, there are a few psychological reasons that make us, humans, fall into relationships too soon without even bothering about the backwash.

  • You had bad or dramatic relationships before and now you just fall into a new one to forget about that pain.
  • You don’t give yourself enough time to know your new partner well enough.
  • You think of a person better than he/she is.
  • You are afraid that, if you don’t create a couple now, you will not be able to do this at all.

Of course, there are many more reasons which are way more serious and are often connected with the dramatic or even traumatic relationship experience that took place in a person’s past. But that is something that has to be explored and treated in a psychologist’s cabinet.

What happens most of the time is that we are simply afraid to be alone which pushes us into a new love affair or a new relationship without even trying to know that person better! We are taking what we see as a true picture forgetting that people tend to put their best foot forward during the first few dates!

All this leads to a very short-term relationship that causes more pain than pleasure and leaves both partners heartbroken again.

To avoid this sad scenario, always give yourself time to know the person better, and believe that this is not your last date or relationship in this life!

So today we told you a lot of interesting things about dating and relationships! This topic will probably never be out of interest since people always tend to search for a couple to create a strong and long-lasting bond.

However, if you are just in the process of searching, and you are not quite sure when it is the optimal time to ask a girl to become your girlfriend, this article will help you to clear things up a bit. Also, we do hope that now you will think of building relationships more seriously since this is indeed a responsible process!

Frequently Asked Questions

⭐ How long does it take to get a girlfriend?

It depends. On average, you can find a new crush in a month or two.

⭐ Why is it exciting asking someone to be your girlfriend?

You feel excited because you are worried about what that person can answer.

⭐ When is the right time to ask a girl to be your girlfriend?

There’s no exact timing. You need to feel when you’re ready to ask her.

Written by
Kate worked in "The Fashion Magazine" for four years as a freelance writer and loved to consult and help people with their style. How to create your own style, how to look beautiful, and select trendy colors for your hair - these are just a few of many issues Kate will happily explain in Beezzly Beauty blogs!
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How long should you wait to ask a girl out?How long should you wait to ask a girl out?