How to Respond When Someone Says You Deserve Better?

Does this phrase mean he thinks you are not a worthy partner for him? Let’s try to figure this out!

Written by Kate Holmsy. Updated on How to Respond When Someone Says You Deserve Better

When a guy says you deserve better, girls tend to hear it as a rejection. However, it is not always like that. Sometimes, behind these words, there are serious reasons a man has to not enter a romantic relationship with you.

How should you respond when he says you deserve better?

This is what you are going to find out today. In this article, we will share some helpful quotes and phrases that you can use to respond to a man who says you deserve someone better than him.

Also, we will explain why people (both men and women) can say so.

How to Respond to You Deserve Better?

When a man says you deserve better and refuses to start a relationship with you, it always hurts. But also, these words may also leave an unpleasant feeling of you being cheated.

Does he truly think so? Doesn’t it mean that he thinks I’m not good enough for him/ not worthy of him?

Is it possible there is another reason for these words? For sure, having such thoughts prevents you from giving a clear and reasonable response!

Below, we have collected the most helpful ways of responding to such words from a man. You can use them when you are not sure what to say in order not to sound offended or angry, as well as not harm his feelings by unreasonable accusations.

  • I know. (if someone is trying to judge your relationship or is concerned about you).
  • That’s none of your business. (An excellent way to let people know they are crossing the line!).
  • I don’t talk about your relationship, so please don’t talk about mine.
  • I know you are saying this because you care about me, but every relationship has challenges. (when a friend judges your relationship from his/her perspective).
  • Thanks. I appreciate your honesty. (can be used in any situation).
  • I know you have had a bad experience in relationships before, but it doesn’t mean I will have the same. Not all guys/girls are the same (when a person is projecting his/her insecurities on you)
  • He/she is not like that, so stop it.
  • Thanks for the heads up, but it’s all good over here.
  • You should know, huh? (use it when you know exactly what the person went through and you think you should adhere)
  • Look, you are the most beautiful person I know. So please don’t think about yourself like that!
  • I don’t know if you mean that or if it’s your fear, but I think you should give this a chance.
  • Well, thanks for letting me down easy (if your crush doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you)
  • I get that. I hope you will find someone who works out for you.
  • You’re right. I am better off without you (if your crush is trying to break up with you this way)
  • Yeah, and I’m the best you’ll ever have!
  • Is it possible for us to fix this somehow?

With these responsive phrases, you will be able to find a suitable reply almost in any situation. But even if not, they will at least give you a few ideas of what you can say when a man says you deserve someone better than him.

How to Respond to You Deserve Better
Krakenimages via VistaCreate

What Does It Mean When Someone Says You Deserve Better?

When a man tells you that you deserve better, many women wonder why he can do that. you can hear these words from very handsome and successful guys, so naturally, it looks strange! What could make them think or believe they are not worthy of your feelings?

In general, the phrase “you deserve better” has several meanings. The one a man uses depends on background information like his emotional state, life circumstances, relationship status, etc. Below, you can find a few more detailed explanations on this subject.

What Does It Mean When Someone Says You Deserve Better
Krakenimages via VistaCreate

He Might Tell You This As a Compliment

A man may say, “You deserve better than me,” as a compliment. In this case, he can use this phrase in two situations:

  • if he believes you are too good for him to start a relationship
  • if he thinks you are too good as a partner for the person you are with right now

However, when you don’t know about such nuances, it is very easy to take a compliment like this the wrong way!

He Feels Insecure

A crush or partner may say you deserve better than them because they don’t feel good about themselves. They may think they’re not rich enough, not skinny enough, not handsome enough, not smart enough, or for any other silly reason! But this reason is far from being silly for them.

He Feels Insecure
Koldunov via VistaCreate

He Is Concerned About You

If a man says you deserve better, perhaps he sees you are mistreated or underestimated in your existing relationship. By saying this to you, he wants you to reevaluate your situation.

Maybe he used to have similar experiences before, and now he can see the red flags coming before you do. In this case, it could be wise of you to adhere to his words.

He Could Say It In a Judgemental Way

Every relationship comes through many ups and downs, but that doesn’t mean you should turn around and leave at the first sign of trouble! Some people will judge these rough patches and try to bring you down.

He Could Say It In a Judgemental Way
Koldunova_Anna via VistaCreate

This Might Be an Excuse

A man may sometimes say you deserve better if he doesn’t want to start a relationship with you. Also, it could be an excuse for ending a relationship you have with him right now. Sometimes, there’s a real reason, and he is just afraid to say it or wants to spare your feelings.

Other times, he just wants to get out of the relationship (current or prospective) and has no real reason.

He is Not Ready to Give What You Want

Time is one of the essential factors in a relationship. Many women find themselves in a situation where they want to speed things up with their partner, but the guy is not ready yet.

Maybe he still has some doubts about whether to commit to a relationship. Or maybe he is really into you and cares about your feelings, but at the same time, he doesn’t want to have anything serious for now.

He is Not Ready to Give What You Want
Krakenimages via VistaCreate

He Says It to Get Reassurance From You

Sometimes, men can say you deserve better when they need validation. For instance, it often happens when he doesn’t want to break up with you but, at the same time, needs proof that you still have feelings for him. There is also a chance that he wants to know how much you love him and how important he is to you.

This kind of behavior is common for people known as attention seekers. They often need this kind of proof to be sure their partner is still into them. So if your boyfriend has always been an attention seeker, and you know it, then there is a high probability that he wants you to give him more respect and validation.

Yes, it’s just a way for him to satisfy his ego! But this is just him.

He Just Wants to Verify That You Are Willing to Settle For Him

Sometimes, by telling you that you deserve someone better than him, your boyfriend or crush wants to know if you are willing to settle or compromise for him. If your relationship with him is at the initial stage right now, it is essential for you to think carefully about the possible future of the two of you.

Ask yourself if you are willing to make compromises for the sake of this relationship. Are you willing to settle for him?

He Just Wants to Verify That You Are Willing to Settle For Him
Krakenimages via VistaCreate

How to Deal With a Rejection?

If a man says you deserve someone better and this is a rejection, it can be very unpleasant and even hurt! However, it is not the reason to get deeply upset or try to convince him to start a relationship with you!

If a guy tells you that he doesn’t want any romantic relationships right now, he has the right for that, and you can’t make him be with you. The only thing you can do (and this is the only wise thing) is to accept his decision.

One Mindset to Conquer RejectionOne Mindset to Conquer Rejection

However, if you are very much into him, perhaps, you should make sure there is no chance for you as a couple in the future.

Ask this man whether he doesn’t want a relationship with you or doesn’t want them at all. Also, if he doesn’t want a relationship with you, ask him to explain why. Perhaps, you are just not his type! But if he rejects you due to certain life circumstances and there is a chance you could reunite later, ask whether you should wait.

Anyway, if you clearly see there is no way you start a relationship with this particular guy, there is plenty of others!

What’s the point in postponing your life and waiting for someone who is not into you if you could enjoy your life and find true love?!

As you can see, there could be different reasons for a man to say you deserve someone better than him. And some of these reasons are not about you at all! So before you judge him or his behavior, think about the situation and try to evaluate it.

And if you don’t know what to say in response, now you have several practical alternatives of replies that will allow you not to feel awkward.

How to Deal With a Rejection
adriaticphoto via VistaCreate

Frequently Asked Questions

⭐Does “you deserve better” mean he doesn’t like me?

No, this is not only because of that. However, this is one of the possible reasons.

⭐Can the “you deserve better” phrase mean a man is very insecure?

Yes, and it’s one of the most common reasons men use it!

⭐Shall I convince him to be with me if he says I deserve better?

If it’s clear he’s not into you, then don’t waste your time on him!

Written by
Kate worked in "The Fashion Magazine" for four years as a freelance writer and loved to consult and help people with their style. How to create your own style, how to look beautiful, and select trendy colors for your hair - these are just a few of many issues Kate will happily explain in Beezzly Beauty blogs!
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